Our only linkage to each other was two calls twice in the year, in the two consecutive months of October and November. For us being friends was perhaps difficult, but being enemies was hardly a possibility (you said you had tried some nonsense like that), thus we remained as we were.
I can no longer recollect most of the moments spent with you. I am sure you had forgotten them too, the trivial every-days of so many years ago. But you still exist (a halo of what you looked like, sound of voice, devil may care attitude especially wherever exams were concerned).Your presence exists, your absence, even more so.
Our only connect to each other was two calls twice in the year in the two consecutive months of October and November. Adequate or inadequate as it may have been, it was something of a pact. Nothing more or nothing less seemed to be agreeable. I never came to find out what would have come of the pact being broken because we both kept our ends (I suspect I would have been more vengeful than you, not by much, just a little).
Now the pact is disturbed by reasons beyond me and you. There are still so many things to tell you. Ridiculousness remains part and parcel of my life. You would have surely found humour in how I make my own storms and crib about getting drenched. I talk about you now and then. It is not a forced action and it does not cause pain or sorrow. I talk about you like I always did when I was aware of you living somewhere and doing OK.
I always knew you would be doing OK.
Wherever you would go, whoever you meet or whatever you would choose to do. For some reason, it was natural for me to believe so (I am sure it was not just me). And I was content. You doing OK somewhere, I had ceased to be a part of that world, but I was still plenty content.
These days I get mighty uneasy if somebody doesn’t answer the phone – this habit I am going to attribute it to you, unfair as it might be. It’s probably going to stay like that for a while, but I will try to improve. I have also probably started worrying twice as more, trying to improve on that as well.
Another year passed. We grew older – yes you still have about a month and some fifteen-twenty odd days, but I took the liberty of putting you in the same bracket as me. The day went normally well, as I would have told you about, as you might know if you are watching from somewhere.
I wished myself a happy birthday from you.
The pact still remains binding.